Mom, the best.

When i was rushing up to my office from the railway station, i saw something that leads me to a deep thought... i saw a girl with her dad and another with her mom rushing to their own destination... Later i got an idea that they are not related and they had nearly 5ft or more between them... but the girls are more or less of same age, should be around 8 yrs old...
I saw the girl with her dad holding him and running to speed...
and with the other girl, her mom was holding the girl's hand and adjusting herself to her daughter's speed...
here, again ... it is proved that Mom is always more caring than Dad. This doesn't mean Dads are not caring but Moms are always "more" caring.
I remember a short story from a magazine, i don't remember the author or year, should be before 5yrs. I would like to give a hint of that story here...
A boy in his primary school got his marks for the monthly exams and he wants to get them signed only by his dad. He know his dad won't sign because his performance is below average but he don't have other chance and so he went to his dad with the marks sheet. Seeing the marks dad started shouting at him and he know his dad won't end up without beating him. When the dad was about to hit the boy mom rushed up and placed a tight slap in boy's face. Tears rolled down from the boy's face and he can't believe his mom beating him. Dad continued shouting and went out to meet someone after signing his marks sheet.
The boy still can't believe his mom's reaction. He came back to his room crying. His mom followed him to his room with juice and confessed that she slapped him for reason and if she didn't slapped him, his dad would have done that but more. And then he realized that he didn't feel the pain when his mom slapped him and also she did that to stop his dad from beating him.
Mom gave the juice saying, " relax, we shall talk about the marks later and you can join tuition for the subject u feel hard... come to the dining for lunch in half an hour..."

The aim of both mom and dad is same, they want their son to study well for better future... but their reactions are different... Mom's is caring love and Dad's is violent love... both ends up in love... but mom is one step forward... always...

Karthik

this story is long but don't miss it plz...

The clock ticked 10pm when the mangalore express started from the egmore station. We were in joy of attending Godi-ophy marriage next day.
We includes me, gowtham, nasher, iman and aslam(my friends cum roommates).
When we felt there is no movement inside the coach and everyone are settled, we quickly finished our supper and the train reaches tambaram station by 10.35pm.
We settled in the individual berth we liked when the train crossed tambaram. I jumped up to the upper berth near the door, since light can reach me easily and it will help me for reading. We didn't talk much among us since we were busy with our own work. Nasher and Aslam were busy on call, Gowtham and Iman tried to catch up with sleep... and i was enjoying music...
Other 3 in our cabin were a boy of age around 10 and his parents...
In another 15min every lights in the coach were off except the lights in service area. I felt black and white effect with white light on my left and black cabins on my right.
I stopped the music for a while to hear the rythemic sound of the train... wow... i enjoy this sound always ... always with the rythemic shake of train that makes one to dance for the sound of train... in fact i enjoy this daily in local train, but this was different, no noise of public and its late night, cool breeze... i enjoyed the feel and i remember the lines from New radicals' someday we'll know...
"if i could ask God just one question...
y rn't u here with me, tonight..."

I tried to sleep but in couldn't and i started reading... thanks to lights in service area...
i didn't feel like reading after a while and so i took out my scribble pad to scribble something...
i checked my watch for time... it showed 11.20pm... i started scribbling.........

am not sure when did i sleep, voice of a tea boy woke me up... adjusting my spex, i checked the time, it showed few minutes passed mid night...
i moved the scribble pad with pen to the corner and came back to the position to sleep looking the door,
the train started moving... i didn't feel like knowing the station since i knew the train will reach my destination only after 4.30am.
i enjoyed the rythemic sound and dance of the train with my eyes staring at the door...

to my shock a boy of around 16yrs old jumped into the train... i raised my head with shock and gave a strange look at him... he was panting and sweating, he might be running to catch the train...
he saw me after a quick check in the lower half of the dark coach, he felt uncomfortable looking at me and his face showed his fear...
i started at him for a while... felt like asking what made him to take risk to jump into the moving train?
but he was panting... his face changed like he need help...
he checked the dark coach again, everyone were sleeping...
he showed his finger for water! i stretched the water bottle to him... he readily accepted and consumed half the bottle,
he thanked me stretching back the bottle, i sighed... he smiled...
i felt strange to see a young boy jumping into the coach without bag and panting, sweating also not getting into the cabin if his berth is reserved...
i guessed he don't have ticket... but he looked young and i thought i can pass sometime with him...
i jumped down to talk to him, also thinking i can help him if he need any...
i went near him, he moved to the corner near the door... he might be uncomfortable!
what's your berth number?, i will help you to find it out! i told him, later i felt why the damn should i ask him this when am not the TTR...
no sound from him in reply...
don't u have your ticket? i asked him...
rubbing out his sweat with his hand he said he forgot to bring...
really? i bugged him again...
i didn't reserve one really, he replied
don't u know this is punishable to travel without ticket? i told him searching for the notice board that explains about the fine amount.
he didn't reply and he peeped into the coach to check if someone is watching us...
i looked back and found everyone were sleeping...
why did u jump into the train? i bugged him again and again...
tears started rolling down his cheek...
i felt sorry about my attitude, also am not the right person to ask him the ticket.
I didn't know what to do...
don't cry, don't cry... i tried stop him crying.
he sighed and showed his finger for water, i gave him the water and he emptied the bottle...
no sound for sometime... i left him alone to relax and i searched my mobile to check if i got any sms...
no sms or buzz... i moved back to him...
i thought i should be more friendly to him, since no men make mistakes wantedly and he is young, also he may have good reason to travel without ticket.
i went to him and spoke friendly than before...
the overall hints from our conversation are...
his name is karthik,
he just got the results for his 12th exams and to his shock he is failed in a subject. He used to get good marks in his school and he really can't figure how he failed. His parents were broken badly than him. So he ran out from his home with an idea to get back to his home only after getting a degree in medicine.
Sad to hear these, I tried to console him...
this is not end of the road, this is just a speed breaker! i told him...
when we were talking, suddenly we felt the light from the other end of the coach..
oops TTR!!!
i want to hide this guy from TTR... and how???
i took him inside the cabin and asked him to hide below the lower berth, i moved all the bags outside...
he thanked hidding himself under the lower berth... i moved the bags again to hide him... i jumped up to the upper berth quickly...
thank god, no one saw us...

I raised my head to check the TTR... he was nearing to the next cabin...
i closed my eyes pretending to sleep...
after few minutes i felt like he was nearing our cabin and nearing me...
he started shaking my shoulder...
He sounded strange... Get up! Get up!...

his voice faded...
but i heard it again...
Get up! Get up! but it was Gowtham and not TTR...
Get up... we are nearing to Trichy, he said...
oops, is that a dream?!?! i questioned myself rubbing my eyes...
something flashed in my head and i jumped down to check Karthik under the lower berth...
he was not there... but the bags were not at place where we stuffed them before dinner below lower berth...
something inside my head told me to check the water bottle...
i did, quickly... but it was empty!!!
how?... so it was not dream... he was here, but he left without informing me...
and the train reached trichy...
i felt bad...
we took all our bags and stepped out of the train... i searched on either side of the platform to check if i can see karthik by chance...
but no... i didn't see him...
i walked to the main bus terminal near to catch the bus to manaparai.
We had coffee, grabbed couple of newspapers and got into the bus...
bus moved out of bus terminal exactly at 5.30am.
I started to check the results of IPL match. oops! KKR lost the match again... bad bad bad...
i flipped the newspaper from back...
i frozen when i flipped to 3rd page... shocked and i felt someone is tightening my neck...
i widen my eyes to get the clear view... ya... i saw the picture of karthik and the news said he commited suicide!!!
My head started spinning... is that him!!! i started to read the news...
the news said...
his name is karthik, he commited suicide the previous day night jumping from the moving mangalore express train(the one which i travelled yesterday) after knowing he failed in his 12th exams, but actually it was an error in printing the results. Later the authority confirmed he got school second rank.

My heart stopped. I felt like someone nailed my head...
if he commited sucide the previous day then who travelled with me yesterday night? Whom did i helped to hide? Who emptied my water bottle?
so many questions flowed out of my head... without answers...

and

the papers of my scribble pad that i forgot to take from the train started moving to the rythmic move of the train...
the last page showed...
"he thanked hidding himself under the lower berth... i moved the bags again to hide him... i jumped up to the upper berth quickly...
thank god, no one saw us... "

P.S. I dedicate this to my friend Karthik, who committed(reported as!) suicide before our 12th results, fearing of failure(again, reported as!). We missed the chance to wish you for getting School Second Rank... we missing u...

and so i named this post Karthik.

oru chinna Love story

Its almost quarter passed 9 in the morning when i reached station. I searched for my friend but i didn't see him there, we planned to meet in the station by 9am. I buzzed him to his mobile but no response, he might be driving.
Huff... i felt happy... i reached before him!
I didn't find any seating in the lobby though its one of the major station in the city. I moved towards the less crowded corner of the lobby, stuffing back the book i was reading,in to the bag. I reached the water bottle in my bag and sipping the water, i glanced the lobby to find some interesting scene to entertain myself till my friend reach.
Bad luck, all i saw was the crowd rushing to take tickets, broken windows, dusted cream colored wall with notice papers all around, spitted corners...
i checked my mobile and i see no sms...
boring boring... I felt i can pass time talking to Yogi, i buzzed her, no response and then i remember, she never get up before 10am on holidays and its only 9.20am.
When i was cursing myself coming early before my friend and i could have finished my breakfast before i leave my home.
I relaxed myself with the support of wall.

and

I felt a bright light passing on my left, something urged me to see the side...
my head turned to the left without my command rushing i should not miss the scene.
OMG, it is not a light or something else that i sensed but a beautiful girl. I saw a small gang surrounding her, may be her family or friends but i said to myself,
Why should i mind?...
I last in her... she is beautiful.
how will one explain a beautiful girl?
okay... i can tell she looks like a Barbie or an Angel( though i haven't seen any Angel before). no no! she is beautiful like Joshna, my niece and a well known example for a beauty.
oops! i thought Joshna is the one and only beauty until now. But there is another girl on earth.
she looks active though not naughty.
She didn't notice me, but i did saw her continuously and i don't remember if i closed my eye lids... now, I believed in Love at first sight...
I prayed! Oh God, prove me your presence once again. Make her to talk to me.
How silly i am, I can talk to her myself if am really interested in her. Y should i blame God. Let Him take care of someone else life by the time.
And something attracted me towards her. she was in my favorite color, her hair was dark, long unlike other girls of her age and Christ her smile is cho cute.
i cleaned my spex to clear my vision to confirm if she get dimples when smiling...
I totally lost in her! She looked cute, beautiful, innocent, divine, pure and what else will i tell to explain her.
I prayed again. God, make her to talk to me ... please... I believe U r here somewhere in the crowd.
I heard Leo coffee Ads music... oops! my mobile tone... call from my friend.
He reached me finally after confirming the place am waiting.
He started explaing the problems he faced until he reached here. But who cared... i lost myself in her...
I don't know if he sensed what am doing, he raised his voice and am back to him.
he said, Lets go, we are late already!
What? we? it was he who came late!!! but i don't feel like telling this... of course, i lost in her already...
and then to my surprise, i felt i was landed in dreamland...
my friend took me to the girl and the gang :)
Did God heard me?!
well, he started introducing me to everyone...
again!!! who care... introduce the girl first u dumbo,
Shakthi... Her name is Shakthi... to my surprise, thats my fav name for long time. Now i looked into her eyes when he introduced her.
I gave a naughty smile, but she never minded. When everyone getting along with my friend, i tried my luck with Shakthi. I smiled at her again, she never minded but i didn't give up.
i showed some funny expressions, she might have felt irritating and she turned her face to the other side. I felt bad of myself and i felt stupid too. I cursed myself and i turned to my friend.
Again, he said "we are late!" but this time to the gang...
We excused from them and moved towards the exit of the station.
I turned back to see Shakthi, if she wanted to say bye!
"Stupid! remember she didn't even smiled at you and how can you except her to say bye", someone inside me sounded hard...
But to my surprise, she signaled me bye!
I pinched myself to confirm that am not dreaming...and i showed my hand in return with a smile :)
and now i cursed my friend for reaching early! or i might have got more time to see her...

Days rolled on as usual...

and when i crossed that station daily, i prayed God to show her again forgetting that i saw her on a holiday. I bought a small teddy bear and couple of chocos for her, hoping she will accept them when i meet her again.

Goodness!!!
And it happened, after 4 plus weeks...
I saw her again at the same station, this time alone with her mom.
This time on an another holiday and i was alone... so i rushed myself to them...
i greeted them, her mom greeted me back and Shakthi, the cute girl gave me a cute smile :)
she was more beautiful than before. She looked more naughty.
When i gave her a funny smile she moved behind her mom. I really don't have any idea to talk to them, but i felt i want to talk to the girl.
The conversation between me and her mom started in general... But my eyes starred at the girl, who gave her cute smile at times. I hope she too liked me. Thank to God again, He proved He is near me. When she smiled at me this time, i noticed something...
oops! her mom diverted me with her question and i really don't remember the question.
Finally i asked her mom to know how often they come here to the station., thinking i could catch Shakthi back when they come here again,
But ... She said they are here in the city for a summer vacation and they will be leaving to their town in a week time, since Shakthi's 2nd standard class is starting in couple of weeks.
I felt sad, very sad... I told myself that i will miss her... i greeted Shakthi to study well.
I gave her the Teddy bear and chocos, this time she came to me with bright smile and i noticed it again...
oops! again, her mom diverted asking her to thank me.
She thanked me with a kiss. I said "i love u" with a kiss on her forehead (she really have a dark long hair like my niece)...
Am late already. I greeted her mom and Shakthi.
This time when i turned towards them after 4 steps, she said bye with joy and love, She sounds loud...

Broken voice inside me said bye... hoping to meet her again, soon, somehow!


P.S. I started with something and ended up here. I never planned for this but i planned to finish it in 15 lines, i really couldn't. Don't take it as story, since it is not formatted as story. It is just a bla bla bla... i didn't even check the proof, i just want this to be a first feel outcome, i don't want second thoughts.
I will update a small concept behind this post soon in this space.

why do we live...

Its been long time since i flipped through any books. Now a days, I am interested in reading blogs than books. Am happy that i can get more links from Bloggers community in orkut :)
I like reading blogs coz, blogs are short, interesting, funny, stupid, philosophical, soul touching etc... and need not to stick for long time like books. If its boring, u can just pass to next topic and also u can comment on the topic anytime and play bulling him/her :) also to comment one need not to be a genius sometimes.
I started reading with Chinmayee's blog WHATTONAMEIT a year before, passed through many and now am moving with few of my favorites blogs by Sathyanarain, Anuja, Raji, Shantanu and talk of cricket - FAKE IPL PLAYER. So now am not carrying any book to read in train daily, my bags are free from stuffs... i just enjoy music...

Ophylia scraped me "what does living life tothe fullest mean according to you.. why do we live... "

i really don't have the answer, but somehow i pretended and managed to tell her (oops she deleted my reply scrap, no probz),
" it differs according to the people... What made Beethoven's life the fullest? What made the priests and sisters life the fullest? what made Bhagat Singh's life the fullest?... really it differs from people. Music, Love for God, Patriotism, Sports, Nature, science etc anything may make one's life the fullest until they have the real love for it and they live for it."
My answer was a kind of escapisim,
i will feel happy if u people reply for her question :)
"what does living life tothe fullest mean according to you.. why do we live... "